I’m Sure Sarah Huckabee Was Sexy at Some Point in Her Life

It would be grossly unjust if Sarah Huckabee-Sanders was not amongst this repertoire of great women I have been creating portraits of. She is, after all, linguistically creative and holds a very key position in that very white house on Pennsylvania Avenue.

Her skills are unmatched by any predecessors and she is, at least to me, one of the hardest working women in the history of working. I must take my hat and weave off to her. While a woman with minimal luxuries as a result of deciding to be a teacher, however, I’m slightly disappointed Sarah’s not taking advantage of the available resources for a woman of her status. Like most women, her dedication to work and family has negated care of self. She just doesn’t appear happy. I understand there are frustrations that come with the weight being Press Secretary. To be bombarded with questions and unsay what your boss said, I would become a heavy drinker myself.

Because of my work, salary and what I encounter on a daily basis in my profession, I need Sarah to come up and stop looking like the school nurse. I see so much potential for how I could use her income that she’s given no thought to. Whatever moves she put on dude to marry and make babies with, I want to see that part. I want her to rise above her public role and take her rightful place in history with her feminine wiles poppin’ all over the photo that’ll ultimately document her on Wikipedia.

If she reached down to pull this out for all the world to see, she would face less criticism. We forgive prettiness more easily than someone who’s not. For any blunders Sarah will surely continue to make, the public would at least say, “But she was fly in that suit.” Melania is keenly aware of that.

Instead, what we’re left with after Sarah leaves the podium are inquiries like, What did she just say? Why is she so angry? What’s up with that twang? Did she even try when she woke up this morning? I just don’t want that for her. Though, there is a strong possibility she’s saving in case she’s suddenly downsized to being less than great again. The tight rope she walks is thinning all the time, which brings me back to just how conscientious Sarah is. She’s so aware, you know? This is a spectacular gift women possess that we use for good or evil once we’ve tapped in.

As a doctoral candidate, I certainly don’t advocate women seeking external validation. We’ve come too far to relegate ourselves to surface matters. We’ve come way too far to turn back now. Our lives matter. Woman power! Free at last, thank God Almighty…

Forgive me. I get mixed up sometimes.

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